an early night

We're both so sleepy...we think we're just going to go to bed. Even if it's only 8pm.
Mia had a long sleep today, so we could be in for trouble - she's a nightmare to get to bed if she's not sleepy. Her day naps have long since ceased, but if she does fall asleep in the day, we have learned our lesson to let her wake naturally. It's a horrible afternoon if you don't. Doomed if you do, doomed if you don't.

Josh is more or less sleeping through the night now.

goodnight.

MIA HIA HIA HIAM

We went to a wedding up in Auckland at the end of March, leaving our children to be looked after by their grandparents...it was the first night I'd had away from Joshka and only the 3rd away from Mia. Actually, it was 2 nights - we took an entire weekend off! Out for breakfast, lunch and dinner and a wedding inbetween. A bit of window shopping and dawdling about - bliss! After the 2nd night though, I felt guily about abandoning my children and I could feel the invisible elastic pulling me back. I did miss them!

When we arrived back to see them, I imagined them running out to meet us (slow motion with sun shining in their hair, eyes twinklingetc), squealing with delight at our return (at last!), but the dog ran out to bark at us and in so doing knocked Josh over onto the concrete floor - tears and more tears and tragic performances that not EVEN the long lost mother could fix. S-i-g-h. Eventually we had smiles and cuddles, which was nice.

And then Mia proudly showed us how she could write her own name! We were all, naturally, extremely impressed. Since then it's been hard to get Mia to draw anything apart from her name. MIA MIA MIA MIA MIA MIA appears everywhere. After 2 weeks 'H' started appearing: MIAH MIAH H HI AIHM etc. Now there's the occasional 'O'. Interestingly Mia seems to feel her name is too short, so her 2nd name is appearing:'Jospehine'in the form of 'MIAHIAHIAHIAM'. I think she just wants her name to be longer than Joshkas.

It's rather like a red Indian MIA-HIA-HIA-HIA...MIAHIAHIAHIA.

I'm rambling.

my biker kids...

zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

At night, when I am totally asleep, Mia sneaks into our bed, on my side, and lies perfectly still - usually. At the time, I am totally unaware and it's only a while later when I get restless and too hot, that I know there is a little intruder on my side. I can't let my hand hang out the side, or my foot...and stuck in the middle between Ben and Mia, I get less and less comfortable - my every move a disturbance to my bed partners. I need to let them sleep...we're all so tired...just lie still, let my shoulders out to cool down...but it doesn't work. I NEED MY FEET OUT. And if I'm cold, my feet come under the covers, or somewhere on Ben's leg. My shoulders and chest need to be warm and covered on all accounts, otherwise I can't sleep - too cold. I can wrap my head in the duvet and leave a little hole to breathe through if I'm cold, but my feet, always, need an escape route.
If I'm already in my comfortable sleep position, hand and/or foot hanging out, Mia's taken to, ever so gently, tickling the palm of my hand by way of silent pleading to get in next to me and be warmed up. It's hard to say no to such an ingenious and sensible way of asking me for a snuggle.
If I'm on the edge of the bed, preventing sneaky access, with no bits hanging out, Mia has found another, unnerving, slightly more intimidating way of silent negotiation: she stares intently at me, millimeters from my face, until I awake with a start and welcome her in to comfort me from my abrupt sleep interuption.
I know I shouldn't let her in. Ben is adamant it's a bad idea. And I know he's right. But after being shunned all day for the favourite 'daddy!', it's nice to be wanted. And I know too, it's just because she's clever enough to realise that Ben wouldn't stand for it and marches her sternly back to her bed if she ventures to his side.
So if I'm aware of her intrusions now, I try to get her back to bed. I'm not stupid enough to do this myself of course - it has to be Ben, otherwise the neighbours hear all about it with Mia's protests...and of course she could wake her brother.

Her brother. Another sleep fighter. 'Tragedy' we call him. If he can't get his way he cries tragically and places forehead on floor proclaiming his discontent. I need to get firm with him too...let him learn to put himself to sleep without the little cuddle, or the patting, rocking, rubbing...he's taken to grabbing my hand and trying to secure it underneath him to make sure I'm there every step of the way to his pending sleep. Sometimes he will even stand up and kiss me (what a charmer!) and then giggle...I've come to the conclusion I'm being messed with! But I do like getting sneaky kisses and tight hugs from him...I just need to secure them during the day and not secretly hope I'll get one when I'm putting him to bed.

So, a new, firm, leaf has been turned.

A good night's sleep CAN be had, WILL be had, by me. One day soon.